Relationships are meant to make you happier and inspire you. Your partner should be your refuge and source of strength. Problems may arise, but a strong relationship can overcome them. There are no perfect relationships, but you can continue to nourish your relationship with your partner to make it healthy and long-lasting. You can do this by making an effort to become a conscious partner.
What is a Conscious Partner?
When you are a conscious partner you are actively involved in the relationship. This means you are committed to knowing more about yourself and your partner. You are willing to have tough conversations, and you understand that difficulties are part of growing together. You interact with intention based on what is happening at present.
It takes effort to become a conscious partner, but it’s worth it. In return, you will enjoy a relationship that meets your most fundamental needs of love, security, belonging, and allows you to grow personally and spiritually.
How to be a Conscious Partner
There is no prescribed formula that fits all in becoming a conscious partner. You write your own rules, explore alternative ways to understand each other better, and you keep on learning as you go. But in general, here are some important points you should keep in mind:
Transparency and Intentional Communication
We have the tendency to assume that our partner should know what we’re thinking and know what we expect of them. But as a conscious partner, you accept the fact that for you to best understand each other, clear channels of communication are needed. You have to open up about your expectations even if it means having difficult conversations. For a relationship to last, there should be honesty and transparency.
You must be able to share your deepest thoughts and feelings including sadness, anger, fears, and joys. This is what being emotionally transparent in a relationship is. It is less about telling your partner what you think of him or her.
Aside from transparency in communication, you should also be intentional. Instead of reacting without thinking, you take time to actively listen and understand the situation first and convey your message properly and in a fair manner to your partner.
Active Listening
A conscious partner practices active listening. It requires a conscious effort to listen with empathy and full attention. Your purpose of listening is to understand instead of waiting to respond. Active listening is essential to every healthy and conscious relationship.
When you’re an active listener, your partner will be more open and less defensive because you refrain from making judgments. Your partner will feel safe in expressing their feelings. Listening deeply and carefully shows how much you care about what they’re saying.
Acknowledge All Feelings
As a conscious partner, you welcome all feelings and even fantasies. It may be uncomfortable at first, but it’s very healing in your relationship. We are not used to being completely honest and open about who we are, but one of the best things you can do for yourself and your partner.
Being completely honest and encouraging your partner to do the same may be difficult at first, but it’s the only way for you to have an authentic relationship. We are often used to presenting ourselves the way we think that would please the people we love.
We fear that if they see an undesirable part of us, they may love us less or stop loving us. But if we aren’t completely honest about being who we are, we may not be able to truly have that real connection with our partner.
Practicing radical honesty (which means revealing parts of yourself that are difficult to share and encouraging your partner to do the same) is the best and only way for you to truly understand and know each other. This will strengthen your love for each other and your relationship.
Radical Responsibility
If you’re a conscious partner, you take ownership of your limitations and admit your shortcomings including areas where you need to improve or do better, your triggers, old wounds, unhelpful coping mechanisms, and other undesirable behaviors.
We all have weaknesses and shortcomings. The important thing is we acknowledge them and make an effort to overcome them and become a better person. It takes a high level of self-awareness to own up to the part of us that we don’t want people to see. Sometimes, we are even unaware that we are still carrying emotional baggage brought by unresolved traumas and old wounds that are not yet healed. We may tend to be defensive and unable to fully open up to our partners because of our past experiences.
If you are finding it hard to open up and express what you truly feel to your partner because of past issues and experiences, the Intuitive Healing sessions I offer can help greatly and effectively in resolving old wounds as I specialize in emotional healing and emotional release.
During Intuitive Healing sessions, I locate negative emotions stuck in our bodies. Sometimes our bodies may even share what this negative blockage may be tied to, an emotional memory or certain feeling towards someone or a group or a people. What I do is release these stuck negative emotions so they will no longer affect our present lives and our relationships, while healing any memories or negative feelings that surface. Negative energy can be stored thru layers of energy in the body so the more we’re able to emotionally release, the more it helps us become freer. From that, we’re able to be at peace and it allows us to become a more conscious partner who interacts based on the present situation rather than based on instincts formed by past experiences. It can help in breaking patterns of behavior that hinder us from being transparent and accepting ourselves fully.
Old wounds can be triggered, and sometimes, we misinterpret the feeling as having something to do with our current relationship when it’s not. This is why we need to heal them so the past won’t hold us back or keep us from fully enjoying our present relationship.
Intuitive Healing can help us overcome unhelpful ways of dealing with conflict and unhealthy coping mechanisms that can hurt our relationship.
Every relationship is unique. We all have different experiences and challenges. It’s hard to cover all aspects of how to become a conscious partner. But it all starts in transparency, active listening, acknowledging all feelings, and making sure that you are fully present in your relationship with your partner.
There is no one paradigm that fits all. You can decide on what purpose and vision you have for your relationship and create your own way of developing and nurturing a healthy relationship, the kind of relationship that helps the two of you become the best version of yourselves.
